Tag: ego

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Episode 0058 Tribe OpenMic Truths

The Tribe breaks down Andrea H.’s Five Things to Know About Working the Twelve Steps… challenging “brutal honesty,” redefining surrender, and exposing the difference between surface level recovery and true emotional accountability. Through personal stories of relapse, grief, ego, and redemption, the crew makes one thing clear: insight without action is useless, surrender is strength, and real growth begins when the Steps stop being something you do and become who you are. If you’re tired of checklist recovery and ready to live it, this one’s for you.

 

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Episode 0057 BobF’s Journey – ESH

This week Bob sits down with longtime friend “Mustache Bob” for a raw and revealing conversation about childhood adversity, early addiction, Peace Corps chaos in Liberia, and the hard earned lessons of relapse and redemption. After 18 years sober and a devastating slip, Bob found deeper recovery by fully working the steps, confronting long buried anger and ego, and rebuilding his life through humility and service. His story is a powerful reminder that sobriety isn’t just about not drinking, it’s about becoming willing to change, making amends, and walking a spiritual path one honest day at a time.

Adult Children of Alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families

Springtime in the Ozarks

 

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Events

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Dianne’s Missives February 13, 2026

Thought to Consider…

Life didn’t end when I got sober – it started.
Resentment is like acid, eating away at the vessel it is stored in.
Many people haven’t even a nodding acquaintance with humility as a way of life.
Always remember you’re unique… just like everyone else.

AACRONYMS

A N O N Y M O U S = Actions, Not Our Names, Yield Maintenance Of Unity and Service

“In the first years, those of us who sobered up in A.A. had been grim and utterly hopeless cases, almost without exception. But now younger folks began to appear. Lots of people turned up who still had jobs and homes and health and even good social standing. These in their turn were able to persuade others like themselves of the need for A.A. Of course, it was necessary for these types of newcomers to hit bottom emotionally. But we found they did not have to hit every possible bottom there was in order to admit that they were licked. When one of these mild cases arrived at the conviction that he already had the principal symptoms of alcoholism that was usually enough. He ‘hit bottom’ then and there and so was spared years of anguish.”

An alcoholic life isn’t a happy life. Drinking cuts you off from other people and from God. One of the worst things about drinking is the loneliness. And one of the best things about A.A. is the fellowship. Drinking cuts you off from other people, at least from the people who really matter to you, your family, your coworkers, and your real friends. No matter how much you love them, you build up a wall between you and them by your drinking. You’re cut off from any real companionship with them. As a result, you’re terribly lonely.

“In God’s economy, nothing is wasted. Through failure, we learn a lesson in humility which is probably needed, painful though it is.”

“Some A.A. speakers say, ‘A.A. is a selfish program.’ The word ‘selfish’ ordinarily implies that one is acquisitive, demanding, and thoughtless of the welfare of others. Of course, the A.A. way of life does not at all imply such undesirable traits
If we cannot or will not achieve sobriety, then we become truly lost, right in the here and now. Therefore, our own recovery and spiritual growth have to come first – a right and necessary kind of self-concern.”

Growth

Letting go of everything at once was both painful and terrifying. I could never have accomplished this alone. It took the help, understanding, and wonderful companionship that was given so freely to me by my ex-alkie friends – this and the program of recovery embodied in the Twelve Steps. In learning to practice these steps in my daily living, I began to acquire faith and a philosophy to live by. Whole new vistas were opened up for me, new avenues of experience to be explored, and life began to take on color and interest. In time, I found myself looking forward to each new day with pleasurable anticipation.”

Surrender

On the face of it, surrendering certainly does not seem like winning. But it is in A.A. only after we have come to the end of our rope, hit a stone wall in some aspect of our lives beyond which we can go no further; only when we hit “bottom” in despair and surrender, can we accomplish sobriety which we could never accomplish before. We must, and we do, surrender in order to win.

The great mystery is: “Why do some of us die alcoholic deaths, fighting to preserve the ‘independence’ of our ego, while others seem to sober up effortlessly in A.A.?” Help from a Higher Power, the gift of sobriety, came to me when an otherwise unexplained desire to stop drinking coincided with my willingness to accept the suggestions of the men and women of A.A. I had to surrender, for only by reaching out to God and my fellows could I be rescued.

Dianne

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Episode 0055 Joel B’s Journey – ESH

Joel’s story is a blunt reminder that rock bottom doesn’t always involve handcuffs or headlines. In this episode, Joel opens up about childhood trauma, addiction, ego, control, relapse, and the moment his internal voice shifted from self hatred to hope. He shares how detox, honesty, service work, music, and community, especially Bridging the Gap, became the foundation of his recovery. This episode explores shame, guilt, faith without dogma, the danger of isolation, and why “the only thing waiting in the comfort zone is alcoholism.” If you’re new to recovery, stuck in the middle, or questioning whether change is possible, Joel’s experience offers a grounded, lived example of how growth happens one honest step at a time.

New Year One Honest Challenge – you can use the links below to submit.

Text Us at 501-613-8915

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Email us team@shoutoutfromthepit.com

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Dianne’s Missives January 16, 2026

Thought to Consider…

Laughter is the sound of recovery
Once we clear a hurdle, it doesn’t seem so high.
The alcoholic is in no greater peril than when he takes sobriety for granted.

AACRONYMS

E G O = Easing God Out
F E A R = Fools Every Alcoholic Repeatedly

“We have seen the truth demonstrated again and again: ‘Once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic.”

By going back in our own drinking histories, we could show that years before we realized it, we were out of control, that our drinking even then was no mere habit, that it was indeed the beginning of a fatal progression

Reprieve

It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all our activities. “How can I best serve Thee – Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.

Coping

God willing, we members of A.A. may never again have to deal with drinking, but we have to deal with sobriety every day. How do we do it? By learning – through practicing the Twelve Steps and through sharing at meetings – how to cope with the problems that we looked to booze to solve, back in our drinking days . . . We learn how to level out the emotional swings that got us into trouble both when we were up and when we were down.

Essentials

“After years of sobriety I occasionally ask myself: ‘Can it be this simple?’ Then, at meetings, I see former cynics and skeptics who have walked the A.A. path out of hell by packaging their lives, without alcohol, into twenty-four hour segments, during which they practice a few principles to the best of their individual abilities. And then I know again that, while it isn’t always easy, if I keep it simple, it works.”

THE VICTORY OF SURRENDER

We perceive that only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength. Our admissions of personal powerlessness finally turn out to be firm bedrock upon which happy and purposeful lives may be built.

“We decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.”

Sponsors

Every sponsor is necessarily a leader. The stakes are huge. A human life, and usually the happiness of a whole family, hangs in the balance. What the sponsor does and says, how well he estimates the reactions of his prospects, how well he times and makes his presentation, how well he handles criticisms, and how well he leads his prospect on by personal spiritual example . . . well, these attributes of leadership can make all the difference, often the difference between life and death. Thank God that Alcoholics Anonymous is blessed with so much leadership in each and all of its great affairs!

Dianne

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Dianne’s Missives October 31

Thought to Consider…

It is the highest form of self-respect to admit mistakes and to make amends for them.
A.A. is not something you join, it’s a way of life.
Without unity, the heart of A.A. would cease to beat; . . .
God seldom becomes a reality until God becomes a necessity.
Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less often.

AACRONYMS

E G O = Easing God Out
H A L T = Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired
With the self-discipline and insight gained from practicing Step Ten, I begin to know the gratifications of sobriety – not as mere abstinence from alcohol, but as recovery in every department of my life.

I renew hope, regenerate faith, and regain the dignity of self-respect. I discover the word “and” in the phrase “and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.”
Reassured that I am no longer always wrong, I learn to accept myself as I am, with a new sense of the miracles of sobriety and serenity.
“To be gravely affected, one does not necessarily have to drink a long time nor take the quantities some of us have. This is particularly true of women. Potential female alcoholics often turn into the real thing and are gone beyond recall in a few years.”
The only thing that matters is that he is an alcoholic who has found a key to sobriety. These legacies of suffering and of recovery are easily passed among alcoholics, one to the other. This is our gift from God, and its bestowal upon others like us is the one aim that today animates A.A.’s all around the globe.

People of Faith

“We who have traveled a path through agnosticism or atheism beg you to lay aside prejudice, even against organized religion. We have learned that, whatever the human frailties of various faiths may be, those faiths have given purpose and direction to millions. People of faith have a rational idea of what life is all about. Actually, we used to have no reasonable conception whatever. We used to amuse ourselves by cynically dissecting spiritual beliefs and practices, when we might have seen that many spiritually minded persons of all races, colors, and creeds were demonstrating a degree of stability, happiness, and usefulness that we should have sought for ourselves.”
It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. “How can I best serve Thee-Thy will (not mine) be done.” These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.
The honesty expressed by the members of A.A. in meetings has the power to open our mind. Nothing can block the flow of energy that honesty carries with it. The only obstacle to this flow of energy is inebriation, but even then, no one will find a closed door if he or she has left and chooses to return. Once he or she has received the gift of sobriety, each A.A. member is challenged on a daily basis to accept a program of honesty.
Dianne
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Dianne’s Missives Jun 27

Thought to Consider…

Let us always love the best in others – and never fear their worst.
There is no progress without change.
It is the highest form of self-respect to admit mistakes and to make amends for them.

“When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is or He isn’t.”

AACRONYMS

E G O = Easing God Out
D E A D = Drinking Ends All Dreams

Egomania

“Our egomania digs two disastrous pitfalls. Either we insist on dominating the people we know, or we depend upon them far too much. If we lean too heavily on people, they will sooner or later fail us, for they are human, too, and cannot possibly meet our own incessant demands . . . We have not once sought to be one in a family, to be a friend among friends, to be a worker among workers, to be a useful member of society.”

This Matter of Honesty

“‘Only God can fully know what absolute honesty is. Therefore, each of us has to conceive what this great ideal may be – to the best or our ability.’ Fallible as we all are, and will be in this life, it would be presumption to suppose that we could ever really achieve absolute honesty. The best we can do is to strive for a better quality of honesty. Sometimes we need to place love ahead of indiscriminate ‘factual honesty.’ We cannot, under the guise of ‘perfect honesty,’ cruelly and unnecessarily hurt others. Always one must ask, ‘What is the best and most loving thing I can do?'”

Spirituality

“Do not let any prejudice you may have against spiritual terms deter you from honestly asking yourself what they mean to you. At the start, this was all we needed to commence spiritual growth, to effect our first conscious relation with God as we understood Him. Afterward, we found ourselves accepting many things which then seemed entirely out of reach. That was growth, but if we wished to grow, we had to begin somewhere. So, we used our own conception, however limited it was.”

Obedience

“We of A.A. obey spiritual principles, at first because we must, then because we ought to, and ultimately because we love the kind of life such obedience brings. Great suffering and great love are A.A.’s disciplinarians; we need no others.”
“Showing others who suffer how we were given help is the very thing which makes life seem so worthwhile to us now. Cling to the thought that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have – the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them.”

Friendship

“Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill. Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up around you, to have a host of friends – this is an experience you must not miss. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.”

Progress

Step Six: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

“If we ask, God will certainly forgive our derelictions. But in no case does He render us white as snow and keep us that way without our cooperation. That is something we are supposed to be willing to work toward ourselves. He asks only that we try as best we know how to make progress in the building of character.”

Dianne
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