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Episode 0055 Joel B’s Journey – ESH

Joel’s story is a blunt reminder that rock bottom doesn’t always involve handcuffs or headlines. In this episode, Joel opens up about childhood trauma, addiction, ego, control, relapse, and the moment his internal voice shifted from self hatred to hope. He shares how detox, honesty, service work, music, and community, especially Bridging the Gap, became the foundation of his recovery. This episode explores shame, guilt, faith without dogma, the danger of isolation, and why “the only thing waiting in the comfort zone is alcoholism.” If you’re new to recovery, stuck in the middle, or questioning whether change is possible, Joel’s experience offers a grounded, lived example of how growth happens one honest step at a time.

New Year One Honest Challenge – you can use the links below to submit.

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Dianne’s Missives January 23, 2026

Thought to Consider…

I keep my sobriety by giving it away.
Courage is the willingness to accept fear and act anyway.
The ankle-biters of everyday struggles will eat away at me unless I go to meetings and call my sponsor.
There’s no elevator, you have to take the Steps.

AACRONYMS

F E A R =Face Everything And Recover
D E N I A L = Don’t Even Notice I Am Lying

Paradox

Step One: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol, that our lives had become unmanageable. “We had approached A.A. expecting to be taught self-confidence. Then we had been told that so far as alcohol is concerned, self-confidence was no good whatever; in fact, it was a total liability. Our sponsors declared that we were the victims of a mental obsession so subtly powerful that no amount of human willpower could break it. There was, they said, no such thing as the personal conquest of this compulsion by the unaided will. The tyrant alcohol wielded a double-edged sword over us: first we were smitten by an insane urge that condemned us to go on drinking, and then by an allergy of the body that insured we would ultimately destroy ourselves in the process. Few indeed were those who, so assailed, had ever won through in single-handed combat.”

When I was still drinking, I couldn’t respond to any of life’s situations the way other, more healthy, people could. The smallest incident triggered a state of mind that believed I had to have a drink to numb my feelings. But the numbing did not improve the situation, so I sought further escape in the bottle. Today I must be aware of my alcoholism. I cannot afford to believe that I have gained control of my drinking – or again I will think I have gained control of my life. Such a feeling of control is fatal to my recovery.

Out of the Dark

“Self-searching is the means by which we bring new vision, action, and grace to bear upon the dark and negative side of our natures. With it comes the development of that kind of humility that makes it possible for us to receive God’s help. Yet it is only a step. We will want to go further. We will want the good that is in us all, even in the worst of us, to flower and to grow. But first of all we shall want sunlight; nothing much can grow in the dark. Meditation is our step out into the sun.”

When we were drinking, most of us had no real faith in anything. We may have said that we believed in God, but we didn’t act as though we did. We never honestly asked God to help us and we never really accepted His help. To us, faith looked like helplessness. But when we came into A.A., we began to have faith in God. And we found out that faith gave us the strength we needed to overcome drinking.

The longer we are in A.A., the more natural this way of life seems. Our old drinking lives were a very unnatural way of living. Our present sober lives are the most natural way we could possibly live. During the early years of our drinking, our lives weren’t so different from the lives of a lot of other people. But as we gradually became problem drinkers, our lives became more and more unnatural.

We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition.

ACCEPTING OUR PRESENT CIRCUMSTANCES

Our very first problem is to accept our present circumstances as they are, ourselves as we are, and the people about us as they are. This is to adopt a realistic humility without which no genuine advance can even begin. Again and again, we shall need to return to that unflattering point of departure. This is an exercise in acceptance that we can profitably practice every day of our lives. Provided we strenuously avoid turning these realistic surveys of the facts of life into unrealistic alibis for apathy or defeatism, they can be the sure foundation upon which increased emotional health and therefore spiritual progress can be built.

Satisfaction

No satisfaction has been deeper and no joy greater than in a Twelfth Step job well done. To watch the eyes of men and women with wonder as they move from darkness into light, to see their lives quickly fill with new purpose and meaning, to see whole families reassembled, to see the alcoholic outcast received back into his community in full citizenship, and above all to watch these people awaken to the presence of a loving God in their lives – these things are the substance of what we receive as we carry A.A.’s message to the next alcoholic.

What is this power that A.A. possesses? This curative power? I don’t know what it is. I suppose the doctor might say, “This is psychosomatic medicine.” I suppose the psychiatrist might say, “This is benevolent interpersonal relations.” I suppose others would say, “This is group psychotherapy.” To me it is God.

Dianne

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Dianne’s Missives January 9, 2026

Thought to Consider…

It works – it really does!
Sorrow looks back, worry looks around and faith looks within.
Anger is the hot wind that extinguishes the light of reason.

AACRONYMS

F A I T H = Finding Answers In The Heart
C A L M = Can Anger Leave Me?

Step One: We admitted we were powerless over alcohol- that our lives had become unmanageable.

Seed

“It was then discovered that when one alcoholic had planted in the mind of another the true nature of his malady, that person could never be the same again. Following every spree, he would say to himself, ‘Maybe those A.A.’s were right . . .’ After a few such experiences, often years before the onset of extreme difficulties, he would return to us convinced. He had hit bottom as truly as any of us. Alcohol itself had become our best advocate.

We thought “conditions” drove us to drink, and when we tried to correct these conditions and found that we couldn’t do so to our entire satisfaction, our drinking went out of hand and we became alcoholics. It never occurred to us that we needed to change ourselves to meet conditions, whatever they were.

Resentments

Few people have been more victimized by resentments than have we alcoholics. It mattered little whether our resentments were justified or not. A burst of temper could spoil a day, and a well – nursed grudge could make us miserably ineffective. Nor were we ever skillful in separating justified from unjustified anger. As we saw it, our wrath was always justified. Anger, that occasional luxury of more balanced people, could keep us on an emotional jag indefinitely. These emotional “dry benders” often led straight to the bottle. Other kinds of disturbance – jealousy, envy, self-pity, or hurt pride – did the same thing.

“The explanation that alcoholism was a disease of a two-fold nature, an allergy of the body and an obsession of the mind, cleared up a number of puzzling questions for me. The allergy we could do nothing about. Somehow our bodies had reached the point where we could no longer absorb alcohol in our systems. The why is not important; the fact is that one drink will set up a reaction in our system that requires more, that one drink is too much and a hundred drinks are not enough.”

TOTAL ACCEPTANCE

He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.
Only an alcoholic can understand the exact meaning of a statement like this one. The double standard that held me captive as an active alcoholic also filled me with terror and confusion: “If I don’t get a drink I’m going to die,” competed with “If I continue drinking it’s going to kill me.” Both compulsive thoughts pushed me ever closer to the bottom. That bottom produced a total acceptance of my alcoholism – with no reservations whatsoever – and one that was absolutely essential for my recovery. It was a dilemma unlike anything I had ever faced, but as I found out later on, a necessary one if I was to succeed in this program.

Guidance

Walk day by day in the path of spiritual progress. If you persist, remarkable things will happen. When we look back, we realize the things which came to us when we put ourselves in God’s hands, were better than anything we could have planned. Follow the dictates of a Higher Power and you will presently live in a new and wonderful world, no matter what your present circumstances!

Faith

When I was driven to my knees by alcohol, I was made ready to ask for the gift of faith. And all was changed. Never again, my pains and problems notwithstanding, would I experience my former desolation. I saw the universe to be lighted by God’s love; I was alone no more.

Dianne

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Episode 0050 Team Cheremy: The Alcoholic Family

This episode Team Cheremy opens the new year with a raw, deeply personal conversation about the family disease of alcoholism, focusing on how addiction and recovery ripple across generations. They explore lived experience rather than theory, as Linda and her niece Lauren both sober members of Alcoholics Anonymous share candid stories of growing up around alcoholism, navigating abandonment, secrecy, relapse, and ultimately finding recovery, boundaries, and spiritual grounding. Through honest dialogue, reflections, and practical insight, the episode examines detachment with love, family roles, myths around “rock bottom,” and how trust in recovery communities can heal fractured relationships. The result is an educational, unscripted discussion offering hope, clarity, and tools for families and individuals walking the long road of recovery together.

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Email us team@shoutoutfromthepit.com

 

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Episode 0047 Ladies Round Table with Cherie & Mandy

In this Ladies Round Table, Cherie and Mandy gather an incredible circle of women to dive into the messy, beautiful realities of Attitude, Acceptance, and Action three deceptively simple words that turn into raw, life altering conversations. From childhood anxiety to lifelong people pleasing, from loss that shatters faith to grief that rewires identity, the group shares honest tools, morning rituals, spiritual practices, and the hard won wisdom that keeps them sober, centered, and moving forward. What unfolds is a vulnerable, uplifting look at how women endure, rebuild, and show up for life on life’s terms together, unfiltered, and anchored in hope.

Attitude.

  • What do you do first thing to get your attitude right to face the day?
  • When your attitude stinks and you are just trying to get to the end of the day what things have you tried and have worked to turn your bad attitude (frown upside down)?
  • What about dealing with others attitudes?
  • What is the most helpful tool you are using today?

Acceptance

  • What do you find the hardest to accept? How did you get to the place you are today with it?
  • Acceptance towards yourself- how do you feel about your shortcoming? How do you find yourself acceptable?
  • In the moment when you find yourself not able to accept the situation what are things you have done to save your butt? Or if you didn’t have anything things you can share for others to avoid?
  • What about long term acceptance, when things you thought you have accepted come back into play?

Action

  • What is something you took action on and it came out totally not like you thought it would. Good or bad?
  • What does taking action look like for you?
  • How do you know the action you are taking is the correct one?
  • When you realize it might have been the correct one what do you do?
  • What are some small action you took that lead to a big learning lesson for you?

 

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Episode 0041 Be You

This short centers around personal authenticity and recovery, using the “Three A’s” Awareness, Acceptance, and Action as a roadmap for self-improvement. Bob shares personal reflections on identity, fear of rejection, and the masks people wear to fit in. The episode mixes humor, spiritual insight, and practical steps for letting go of old habits and embracing genuine selfhood

  1. Awareness – Recognize the Phony Self
  2. Acceptance – Embrace the Suck
  3. Action – Let It Go & Move Forward

Practical Habit-Building Tips

  • Start small: build habits gradually
  • Habit stack: tie new behaviors to existing routines
  • Be consistent, not perfect: occasional failures are normal
  • Track progress: apps like Map My Run help visualize growth
  • Reward progress: celebrate wins, even small ones

Note that creating healthy habits can take 18–254 days, averaging around 66, but warning don’t let statistics become excuses.

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